This question came up in discussion with a dear friend yesterday. We were talking about the issues that still trip us up and cause us to derail from our journey towards really knowing our own worth and living each moment from that inner knowing. We easily recalled times when we “owned” our worth and allowed the light of our own brilliance to flow. Why could not we maintain that momentum? What happened to cause us to go off the rails and get mired down in old fears and doubts again?
As so often happens when we are together and share the same space, the answer to our question came through me as part of our dialogue. We had stopped paying attention to the inner work we were doing. We had gotten cocky and assumed that we had this cased. As soon as we stopped our consistent, daily focus to build and maintain our sense of worth and self-love, the shadowy specters of old fears started playing their familiar tracks in our heads, and we stumbled and fell.
That insight made sense. I immediately remembered my focus on positive affirmations of self-love. I used to have them posted in several places around my home, and I would repeat them to myself multiple times every day. I used to do the mirror work that Louise Hay suggests where I looked at myself in the mirror and told myself, “I love you,” over and over until I was comfortable with it and felt myself open within these to declarations of self-love . I had stopped doing that work.
I realized that as soon as I stopped this reprogramming work, the old reels of self-talk resumed their inner monologue that spoke of self-doubt and lack of worth. In a sudden moment of clarity, it all made sense. We are working to correct a lifetime of negative inner self-talk; in fact, we are working to reprogram our minds to correct generations of feeling like we are not enough and that we do not measure up in the eyes of others. We know that we do respond to a daily practice of replacing this inner sense of lack with affirmations of love and worth. We feel better inside, and as that happens, it shows on our outsides, and we flourish. We glow because we are owning and opening into the recognition of our own innately worthy selves.
Because we are working to correct a lifetime, and even generations, of negative inner beliefs, as soon as we stop this daily practice, it does not take long before we default to the self-talk that characterized our lives for years. Our practice had not developed to a point where it could sustain itself. The positive affirmations were working to change our inner beliefs, but they had not reached a point where they had created last change within us.
My friend and I realized that we fell off the rails because we stopped paying attention to our inner work. We felt better, and so, we started to coast. As we covered, we focused on our inner work only now and then until the practice that had led to such a different inner change was discarded and resigned to the “I remember; I used to do that” recollection pile. As we let our inner work fall away, we fell prey to the familiar voices in our head that told us that we were not good enough and that we would never measure up.
What do I take away from our conversation? My inner work must be my priority. I can not allow myself to become distracted or complacent because when I do, old fears and doubts step back in to take over my thoughts, and I find myself back where I started.
My dear spiritual brother and sisters, when you fall off the rails of your inner journey, know that you can step right back on. All you have to do is resume your focus on positive self-talk and affirmations of your worth, and make it a daily practice. You are so worthy of this journey for it leads to you embracing your true identity as a Child of God – always loved and always worthy, with no need to prove anything to anyone. Namaste.