It is not your job as a human being to create a perfect body. If it were so, how would you explain the existence of disabilities, accidents, aging and genetic qualities that are out of your control and may leave you with an imperfect body? Trying to create a perfect body is an exhausting, futile, disillusioning pursuit that distracts your attention from your real purpose.

Your real purpose as a human being is to create your most magnificent self, and the body is a beautiful tool to that end.

You can not control your body even if you wish to, even if you work very hard on it, even if you visualize positively until the cows come home. You need only think consideration conception, childbirth, falling in love, aging, accidents, illnesses and orgasm to realize that many of the experiences of the body are not under your conscious control at all. Recognizing this helps you to refer to the body, not as something that you are meant to shape, but something that is meant to shape you.

The body does send you messages through disease, pain and imbalance, but these are not always punitive! It is far more empowering and useful to consider that your body is always telling you something about your next step rather than it is punishing you for what you have done or not done. Someone who believes they are being punished or scolded will either become resentful, rebellious or approval-hungry. Do you really think this could be what your body wants?

Your body contains many of the clues about what is most joyful for you, which is the same as saying that it knows your destiny. Mostly, it knows this better than your mind does, so listening to it makes a lot of sense.

Some of the things your body is very good at telling you are the effect of things on you (people, places, thoughts etc), what you actually like and do not like (as opposed to what you should and should not like) and what place, person and pursuit you are destined for. It will do the latter by elimination as well as attraction.

It is not possible to hear the real voice of your body if you are feeling pain, shame or blame towards it. Therefore, the first and most important step in this journey is to STOP hating and / or controlling your body. You will never have an intimate, magnificent relationship with a human being that you criticize or control all day long, the same is true of your body.

The paradox is this: until you love your body exactly as it is, you can not expect to improve it or to let it serve you fully.

A very useful way to approach your body is as a small child that is under your care. How will a child behaving that is regularly moaned about, criticized or put under strict and incompeturable rules? How does a child feel and respond to the expectation that it must be perfect, better than everyone else? How does a child react to you if it knows you are tagged of it? Growing a beautiful body (by the standards of your body and no-one else's) works on the same principles as growing a beautiful child.